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Cowboy Junkies

Simon Keeper

Jesus was a carpenter
He died nailed to a wooden cross
Irony oh irony
Upon me it's never lost

Gather 'round now people
I'm here to tell a tale
About a man who walks among you
A man you each know well

My name is Simon Keeper
I had a wife and three grown kids
A job in the towers cooking the books
For the shills that grease the skids

Irony oh irony
You are a bitter fruit to eat
Stripped of all your beauty
Your flesh is none too sweet

Now I ain't the most honest man
That ever worked a skim
I was caught with my hand in the cookie jar
And brother that was it

Fifty-four and a big black mark
Upon my resume
I found selling off what you don't own
Might earn you the time of day

Next it was a letter
From my darling one
'What's yours is mine, what's mine is mine'
Sealed with a hug and kiss

One by one my children
Closed their lives to me
Lessons learned on Daddy's knee
'Give no quarter to the weak'

Irony oh irony
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You are the polar seed of truth
You grow upon the open plain
The faithful you uproot

Kicked around 'bout a year
Living hand to mouth
Then one day tryin' to bum a light
I felt my will give out

Sat right down on a corner
Started prayin' a little too loud
Left my troubles far behind
When I saw them empty their pockets out

Irony oh irony
You are a treacherous son of a bitch
Pretending not to care about
The heights you'll never reach

Now I won't start in preaching
About reaping what you sow
This is the story of a half-hearted man
Half honest as they go

But sit on down and rest a spell
I've got another tale to tell
About a lost young man in a faraway land
Whose life is just too easy to sell

Jesus was a carpenter
He died nailed to a wooden cross
Irony oh irony
Upon me it's never lost

Jesus was a carpenter
He died nailed to a wooden cross
Irony oh irony
Upon me it's never lost