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The People's Douche (Prod. by Principal Dean)

[Verse 1]
What's up?
I'm sorry to interupt your evening at the eatery.
I'm about to freak, what you believe,
Unbelievably,
You will see.
Everytime Sparker, comma, Peter speaks.
It's bacon for the jews and gay marriage for the Jesus freaks.
VHS tapes flying out the red box.
All the Yankee's fans cheerin' for the Red Sox.
And the neo nazis, all growing dread locks,
Listening into Erykah Badu,
Until their head nods.
I got Facebook accounts for the amish.
Throw a little steak in,
While I'm makin'
Vegan's omelettes.
Democrats out huntin' in the forestry.
Republicans giving tax cuts to minorities.
All the beer snobs,
Chillin', sippin Natty Ice,
While I take a bachelor
And match him with a battered wife.
Got the Hipsters
Clothes shopping at Wall-Mart.
Hanging with the B-Team,
Acting like they're all stars.
Unplugging tanning booths,
In Little Italy.
Hanging with some country music fans,
Bumping little B.
Making A&R's,
Spit bars and vans,
While I'm reading poetry to some Nascar fans.

[Bridge]
Look, it's Peter Sparker in this bitch.
I'm the people's douche,
And I will never quit until the day I see the poor become the rich,
Or the rich become the poor.
So they're holding open doors,
For the single moms who buy their food up at the dollar store.

[Verse 2]
I got some alpha males thinking they're lame,
Donald Trump just asked me for spare change.
The Westboro baptist church is having gay sex
While I got the sneaker heads,
Shopping up in payless.
Then I got the teenagers all leaving social media
And reading what a library is on Wikipedia.
I can make a morning person sleep to the evening.
Shit I got Lebron James moving back to Cleaveland.
I can get the housewives to all stop gossiping,
And get the Taliban startin' all girls colleges (colleges).
Illiterate people, they all want to read about it.
Let's do something sweet and not tweet about it.
Dead beat dads asking where the diapers are.
Drag queens all dancing in the biker bar.
Jocks giving geeks props as the pass in the hall.
I got Kobe Bryant passing the ball.

[Hook]
I't's Peter Sparker in this bitch.
I'm the people's douche,
And I will never quit until the day I see the poor become the rich,
Or the rich become the poor.
So they're holding open doors,
For the single moms who buy their food up at the dollar store.
Man the day is gonna come when the bosses will be generous
And all the employees will get some benefits,
For once.
And until the day it does,
You know I'm your fucking butt.
It's the people's douche,
Now let me see those dirty hands up!

(Put your hands up!
If you only got a dollar in your pocket
And this shit ain't enough!
Put your hands up!
Put your hands up!
If you're not here to put 'em up
Cause you had to work and couldn't come!

[Hook]