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Original Cast Recording
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Chip On My Shoulder
Emmett：Woah, Elle, what's up doc?
Elle：Love.
Emmett：Excuse me?
Elle：I put my faith in love,
I followed where it led.
Emmett: Love led you here?
Elle: To my personal circle of hell!
It has not worked out well.
I wish that I were dead.
'Cause instead of a wedding and love!
I'm flunking out of school, a total laughingstock!
Someone, he and his friends can just mock!
So, go on, here's my head, just hit it with a rock.
Emmett: Wait, go back,
You came out here to follow a man?
Harvard Law was just part of that plan?
Man, what rich romantic planet are you from?
Elle: Malibu?
Emmett: Instead of lying outside by the pool,
You stalk some guy to an Ivy League school?
That's the weirdest reason I have -
Elle: Oh, why'd you come?
Emmett: Okay, I grew up in the Roxbury slums.
With my mom and a series of bums.
Guys who showed me all the ways a man can fail.
I got through law school by busting my ass.
Worked two jobs, in addition to class.
So, forgive me for not weeping at your tale.
Elle: Oh, well, excuse me!
Just because you've got some kind of chip on your shoulder.
Emmett: You know what? You're right.
There's a chip on my shoulder and it's big as a boulder.
With the chance I've been given, I'm gonna be driven as hell.
I'm so close I can taste it, so, I'm not gonna waste it.
Yeah, there's a chip on my shoulder, you might wanna get one as well!
Elle: I'm sorry, but that sounds highly negative.
Wait, two jobs plus law school? How do you do it?
Emmett: Well, I don't go to parties a lot,
Not good use of the time that I've got.
Can't spend hours doin' my hair and stayin' in shape.
Elle: I don't spend hours!
Emmett: But I know it'll all be worthwhile,
When I win my first lucrative trial.
And buy my mom that great big house out on the cape.
Elle: Oh, that's so sweet!
Emmett: No, that's the chip on my shoulder,
I hugged my mom and told her
With the chance I've been given, I'm gonna be driven as hell.
Though I can't take the day off, I just think of the payoff.
You need a chip on your shoulder,
Little Miss Woods comma Elle.
Elle: I just need to prove to everyone that I'm serious
Emmett: What you need is to get to work.
Where are your law books?
Elle: Well, I know they're here somewhere...
Emmett: You know, this vanity's real picturesque,
But it started its life as a desk.
Clear it off and find some room for books instead.
Elle: What are you doing?
Emmett: Can you live without this?
Can you live without that?
I don't know what this is.
Elle: It's for hair!
Emmett: Wear a hat.
Spend some time improving what's inside your head.
Out, out, put it in storage, sell it on eBay, leave it behind.
Out, out, what, are you angry? Good, so get angry.
You may find the chip on your shoulder!
Elle: Ugh.
Emmett: Ooh, the room just got colder.
Elle: Hey!
Emmett: But with the chance you've been given,
Why are you not driven as hell?
There's just no way around it,
You gotta plow through till you -
Elle: - found it!
Emmett: Been reading it hard, I can tell.
...
Girls: 'Tis a gift to be simple, 'tis a gift to be free.
Elle: Bye, Warner, have a great Thanksgiving!
Say, hi to your Mom and dad for me!
And Grandma Bootsie.
Emmett: Define, 'Malum prohibitum'.
Elle: 'Malum prohibitum' is um...
Emmett: An act prohibited by -
Elle: - An act prohibited by law like jaywalking,
Or chewing gum in Singapore.
Emmett: Therefore, 'Malum in se'
Elle: Is an action that's evil in itself;
Assault, murder,
White shoes after Labor Day.
Emmett: Good, where are you going?
Elle: Home, of course, it's Thanksgiving break, remember?
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Emmett: Interesting.
Elle: What?
Emmett: Well, I predict you will probably pass -
Elle: Yes!
Emmett: - in the bottom percent of your class.
Elle: What?
Emmett: If you're going for mediocre,
You've done great.
Elle: That's not fair.
Emmett: Look, they laughed at me like they're laughing at you.
We can't win, if we don't follow through.
Might I venture, your vacation plans can wait.
Elle: Why do you always have to be right?
...
Girls: Gloria, in excelsis Deo.
Elle: Bye, Warner! Merry Christmas! Enjoy Bayo.
Emmett: Ho ho ho!
Elle: Emmett!
Emmett: For you.
Not as good as going home for Christmas, but...
Elle: You are too sweet.
Emmett: It's a real time saver, shampoo and conditioner in one.
Elle: Thank you, you are so adorable to think of me
Warner: Elle, hey.
Elle: Warner!
Warner: Have you seen Vivian?
I have been looking for her everywhere.
Elle: Yeah, I, I mean no.
Warner: Great, we're gonna miss our flight.
Emmett: Elle? I don't know if you've noticed before,
But each time Warner walks through the door,
Your IQ goes down to forty, maybe less.
Though it's hardly my business to say,
Could it be the real thing in your way,
Is the very guy you're trying to impress.
Elle: Yes, I've been smiling and sweet,
And thoroughly beaten, blowing my chance.
Let's not chase him away.
Let's face him and say, 'Hey punk, let's dance'!
This chip on my shoulder,
Makes me smarter and bolder.
No more whining or blaming,
I am reclaiming my pride!
Grab that book and let's do this,
Instead of doodling hearts all through this.
Now there's a chip on my shoulder,
Let's see him knock it aside.
Girls: Ah, daughter of Delta Nu,
Show him that you're no fool.
Daughter of Delta Nu,
Go back to school with a big chip on your shoulder!
Warner: Mr. Ladimer was clearly within his rights to ask for visitation,
Without his sperm, the child in question wouldn't exist.
Callahan: Now you're thinking like a lawyer.
Yes, Miss Woods.
Elle: Mr. Huntington makes an excellent point,
But did the defendant keep a log
Of every sperm emission made throughout his life?
Callahan: Interesting, why do you ask?
Elle: Well, unless the defendant attempted to contact every sexual encounter
To find out if a child resulted from those unions,
He has no parental claim over this child whatsoever.
Why now? Why this sperm?
Callahan: I see your point.
Elle: And by Mr. Huntington's standards,
All masturbatory emissions where
The sperm was clearly not seeking an egg
Would be called reckless abandonment.
Callahan: Miss Woods, you just won your case.
Elle: Omigod!
Girls: Wait, hold on, we just won the case!
(Omigod) Elle got all up in Warner's face!
(Omigod) I am starting to like this place!
Yes, omigod!
Callahan: Miss Woods, excellent work today.
I assume you're applying for my internship, do you have a resume?
Elle: I am one step ahead of you.
Here you go and thanks in advance for your consideration.
Callahan: Dear God, it's scented.
Three months ago, I would have recycled this.
Make sure to put it on file.
Emmett: Guess, she got a chip on her shoulder,
Maybe some wise man told her,
With the chance we've been given,
We gotta be driven as hell.
She was something to see there,
I'm just happy I could be there.
First big test and she aced it,
She's so close, she can taste it!
She got a chip on her shoulder,
Guess you never can tell,
With little Miss Woods comma Elle!
Girls: Elle Woods, Woods comma Elle!
Chip on her shoulder!
Elle Woods, Woods comma Elle!
Chip on her shoulder!
Emmett: No, you never can tell!
Girls: Elle Woods, Woods comma Elle!
Chip on her shoulder!
Girls & Emmett: With little Miss Woods comma Elle!
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