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Featherston's Finest



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Featherston's Finest

The Ballad of Swagman Magee

When I was a young lad my Da said to me
If I behave badly then Swagman Magee
Will come round tonight for a word in my ear
And Swagger Magee had been dead for a year

He carried his whole world, stacked high on his back
As he wandered each highway, each low way, each track
But our County would hear no more of his gay song
The day when two lads pulled a prank that went wrong

His days on the road, were hard yet simple
His nights on the road, were often lonely
Yet that was his life, he'd have no other
Oh swagging's the life for the Swagman Magee

Returned from the Great War in 1918,
Though he'd never tell tales of that which he'd seen
Instead, for a pint he would give you a tune
Of elves in the woods, or the man in the moon

To Featherston Town he'd come up for supplies
To stock up on grog, scoff down a few pies
With a feed in his belly he'd leave a fair tip
Then head for the river to have a wee kip

His days on the road, it made him happy
His nights on the road, it made him feel free
The road was his life, he'd have no other
Oh swagging's the life for the Swagman Magee

Down by the banks of the Tau-her'-ni-kau
He would pull at his pipe and watch the stream flow
Lean back on his pack, he'd swig his whiskey
And drift off to sleep beneath the Kauri

Along came the rascals from Underhill Way,
'Let's give the old scruff a cold bath' one would say
And the other agreed and so down the pair crept
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Unheard and unseen down to where Magee slept

His days on the road, were often dangerous
His nights on the road, were downright risky
But that was his life, he'd have no other
Oh swagging's the life for the Swagman Magee

Then out from the bush, they approached from above
With a 1 2 3 4 and an almighty shove
The old boy went rolling down clean off the Bank
His swag became ballast, and down Magee sank

His corpse eddied up down by Madison's place
Such a hideous corpse, for the eels chewed his face
The townsfolk assumed, twas some drunken mishap
But the boys from the town knew it wasn't like that

A noise in the dark, it made them anxious
A splash in the stream, a guilty mem'ry
Their jape cost his life, he'd have no other
Just haunting and taunting for Ghostie Magee

The first lad went down to the priest to confess,
But the revenant haunted, him more and not less,
When he went missing, they searched for a week
They found the young scamp face down in a creek

The next lad had tried to escape his tormenter
Who chased the lad screaming right through the town centre
Just when he re'lised his flight was in vain
The fleer was crushed by the 5: 40 train

So listen my boy, don't play the joker
Treat all with respect, and dignity too
Or one of these nights a face half-eaten
With swag on its back will come hunting for you