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Changstarr
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'Cool' Guys(Skit)
Alright welcome... to the third national DA's
convention on narcotics and dangerous drugs
And now, without further ado...
the man who will define this cancer eating at the heart of America...
Dr. L. Ron Bumquist.
Gonzo:
l saw these bastards in Easy Rider, but l didn't believe they were real.
Not like this, man, not hundreds of them.
Raoul:
They're actually pretty nice people once you get to know them.
Gonzo:
Know them? l know these people in my goddamn blood.
Raoul:
Don't say that word around here. You'll get them excited.
Gonzo:
You're right.
Dr. Bumquist:
The most efficient way for us to do this is for each one of us...
to try and attempt...to imagine what it is like inside...
of the possessed mind of the addict.
For example...a dope fiend...refers to the reefer butt...as a ''roach''...
because...it resembles a cockroach.
Gonzo:
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What the fuck are these people talking about?
You've got to be crazy on acid to think a
joint looks like a goddamn cockroach.
Dr. Bumquist:
You will notice that l have distinguished...
four-- four distinct states of being...
in the cannabis or marijuana society.
They are cool, groovy…hip, and square.
Seldom, if ever--
Gonzo:
Too crazy, man. Too crazy.
We should get the hell out. What a fucking nightmare.
Dr. Bumquist
lf he figures out what is happening...
then he can rise one notch...
and become hip.
And then if he can convince himself...
to approve of what is happening...
then he becomes groovy.
Groooovy.
And then, after that, he can actually raise himself...
to the rank of cool.
He can become one of those...
'Cool' guys.
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