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Clare Bowditch

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Clare Bowditch

When I Was Five

Clare Bowditch & the Feeding Set
If life were like a mountain, did you, did you not fall?
I have missed you since I was five
And I don't recall your eyes but your hands I do recall
And I know how you smelt when you were alive

You died
Like we're all gonna go someday
You died
I was five and I wish you'd stayed

They say you crossed a river to touch God's hand
But I did not understand where he lived
So I tried to write him letters, letters of demand
Saying, 'She's my sister, back you give her'

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You died
Like we're all gonna go someday
You died
I was here and you went away

I didn't see you die, I didn't see your casket
Don't remember if I cried but I never quite got past it
You're fragile like a bee and skinny as a steeple
And all these memories, are they mine or other peoples?

When you died
Like we're all gonna go someday
I was five
And I thought I could make you stay