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Jayn



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Jayn

Monster

Tell me please - what's the point of this reality?
Seems like I'm only here to please, everyone else.
If I lie, will they think that I am really trying?
Seems like we only live to die, so what's the point?

Happy? Could I be happy?
Feels like a dream - just won't come true.

Tell me please - that you've finally gotten sick of me,
I really never try to be, so insecure ...
This self-hate, lurks beneath this stupid game I play,
Feels like I rarely get to say, what's on my mind.

Happy? Hey, are you happy?
Well, can you teach me? To be like you?
My heart - has been torn apart,
This world is so dark,
I just feel lost.

I never wanted to be this way I swear, oh god, I promise,
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I really do try to fight it or to hide it, but inside it,
it just burns it's way through happiness, feels like torture,
I never asked for this,
The monster trapped deep inside of me,
Feeding off my love and sanity,

No matter how I try to block out the voice that tells me I'm worthless,
I can't seem to conquer to beast, I'm always defeated, left here in pieces,
And there's no one who understands they can't stitch me up, though it's nice that they're still 'here',
I'm am the only one ... Who can slay this monster,

Happy? No, I'm not happy.
Though I desperately wish I could be!
I just want to be free, why,
should I have to die - to slay the beast?

If I lie, will the monster keep itself inside?
Seems like we only live to die, so what's the point?