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Nice Peter
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My Right Hand
I'm in love
With my right hand
Ooh yeah
He's always there
When I need a five minute friend
Woah yeah
And I can speed myself up
I can slow myself down
As long as there's no one else around
'Cause it's just me and my adult DVD
And I can freeze the frame at my favourite part and
Pretend that the actress is here
I will pretend that Mandy Mammaries is here with me
I like to call myself up on the phone
Tell me how pretty I look today
'Cause I know I'm a sure thing
I buy myself a dozen roses
Open a bottle of wine and turn the lights down low
And then I start to do my thing
And I can talk to myself
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In a deep sexy voice
Or I can let out an animal noise
'Cause it's just me, I got my privacy
And I can stop right before I explode
Or let it go and wait 'till I reload
Either way I'm gonna love me all night long
I catch myself in the mirror
I say 'Goddamn, I like what I see'
I can't have another girlfriend
'Cause that would just be cheating on me
Yeah yeah yeah do do do
Stay inside and shoot all the goo goo
I'm gonna get real funky
I'm gonna spank my chimpanzee
'Cause tonight I'm making love
To
Me
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